ElizaThinksAllowed

Finding Balance and general BLEURGHHH.

Why is it so hard to find balance? Finding balance is like walking on a tight rope.. literally.. you need balance to walk on a tight rope.. Where am I going with this?

Hehe, I love me some Illy, and the chorus is fitting..

I had an idea for talking about balance and being deep and inspirational.. then it turned into this..

Hello all! I have been off the grid… again.  I’m sorry.

It started with heat exhaustion.

R and I spent two days up the coast, and we’re still not quite accustomed to the potent sun rays here. We were smothered in sunscreen, but it still got us pretty bad. So a few days recovery was needed. Heat exhaustion and sun stroke and all that sucks, big time.

I received a package from one of my sisters. It was books! Memoirs of a Geisha, Rabbit Proof Fence and The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating. I’ve read 2 of the books in school (like a million years ago now), and I’m very much looking forward to reading them again. But my favourite is  ‘ The Sound of a Wild Snail Eating’ by Elisabeth Tova Bailey.

I’d been recommended the book before, but forgot it and that was the end of it. But by chance my sister picked it and sent it.. what are the odds eh? She owns a book store, and of ALLLLL the books, she picks the one I have been trying to remember for ages. Isn’t it awesome? Anyway.. I can’t put it down… well I can, I just don’t like to. Its a beautiful book. Check it out.

She also sent a puzzle book. Crosswords, Sudoku, Brain teasers etc.. so I have been all up in that too… I’m actually pretty smart.. :D

Then I went to the video store… Are they even called that anymore? Dvd store?.. and I hired out some movies, some I’ve seen before, some I haven’t. I was actually looking for ‘Romeo and Juliet’ with Leo,  but they don’t have it. Instead I got:

  • Centre Stage – I want to be a dancer.. *sigh*
  • 10 Things I Hate About You – Heath and 90’s fashion. How could I not?
  • 27 Dresses – Just cos I’m girly and shit
  • This Is 40 – for the LOLs. Haven’t decided if I liked it yet.
  • Eat, Pray Love – I loved the book and the film was amazing. Got me all inspired.
  • Pay It Forward – It’s one of my favourite movies, ever, I think. And I cried all the tears.
  • The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas – I haven’t read the book but I think I might like to. It left me in shock and feeling all the feels. I cried. I liked it. Just quietly, Adults complicate everything.

And I hired 1st season of FRIENDS. So! I have been a very insidey person after all the sun and stuff.

I took a big step and went to the doctors and got a blood test.. I started having a panic attack but I said NOPE… Looked it in the eye and finally faced my fear of impending doom. I am terrified of doctors finding something wrong, but I’m also terrified of there being something wrong.. so naturally, I have avoided both situations and keep worrying.. I’m scared, of being scared, so I stay scared? Oh the logic..

I’ve been going through a bit of a struggle, finding balance..

Over the past few weeks I have noticed I throw myself completely into everything I do, often leaving no room for anything else. There’s nothing wrong with giving 110% but when you do nothing else.. it can become a problem. You lose yourself.

I go through phases. One month it’s reading, the next.. blogging, then yoga, health, outdoorsy things, insidey things etc. For some reason I find it ridiculously difficult to find balance among all the things I want to do, so I do them in waves, instead of making them a part of my everyday life. It may work for some people, but it’s not working for me.

So, that’s something I’ma work on. How? I’ll let you know, when I know.

Zero To Hero has been pretty non interactive. I’m still keeping up with it, just not posting about it.. I skipped a couple but ahhh well.

And this was a post. No structure. My thought train.

It’s been real,

Eliza

This entry was published on January 16, 2014 at 11:18 AM. It’s filed under Anxiety, Music, Travel & Adventures and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

2 thoughts on “Finding Balance and general BLEURGHHH.

  1. Balance! Ah! That’s a hard one, I totally feel you about throwing yourself into everything. It’s draining and then you end up missing things you used to do and can’t find time to keep up with it all… If you figure it out please pass it on ;-)
    From a mother, a librarian, a student, a dancer, an artist and trying to be a blogger :-p
    (All of these things at different times of course)
    Good luck luv!

    Like

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